links for 2006-12-15
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Author Archives: Candice
links for 2006-12-12
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Shit. I guess this proves me wrong!
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What?
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Thank God that the earth is NOT moving!!
Finally! A theory that makes sense!
I’ve pointed this out before, but watch what you say, everyone. There are people out there who are completely unable to comprehend similes and metaphors. This site makes use of this fact to create a parody 9/11 conspiracy argument, claiming trains that were responsible for 9/11. They even quote a witness who saw one of these trains!
Ya know, I’ll bet that a significant number of woos suffer from a learning disability that impairs their ability to understand figurative language…
Dear Marie, our local UPS Driver
(I’ve been writing a lot of curmudgeonly letter lately. Sitting around at home all day is getting to me. The latest one was to UPS, because their driver keeps leaving my packages at the wrong entrance to my apartment building — behind a door that I can’t open without a key, or bugging random people in that part of the building to buzz me in.)
Fuck it, I don’t really feel like arguing with your fat, lazy ass over the phone, so I’m not going to return your call. I’m glad that I got you in trouble with your supervisor badly enough to have to call me, though.
I know the call would be an argument, because fuck, even your message was semi-indignant and defensive. Yes, Marie, the address on the packages said “#### 1 2 N ####### Ave” instead of “#### 1/2 N ####### Ave”. I’ll give you that one. Without the slash, it could be a bit confusing, I guess. So, one point for you. That’s a problem with whatever system removed characters from the label. I have the same problem entering my address into various computer systems. They don’t like the slash one bit.
Buuuuut…
The labels also included my apartment number. There is no 2W at the entrance you left the packages on the inside of. You could not possibly have buzzed any buzzer with the non-existent 2W label. You should have noticed you were at the wrong place. And 2W is in the same building. You only had to go to the next door.
Okay, I guess maybe you could have thought the 2W was wrong as well, or maybe just missed it, since it’s on another line. I guess not everyone is particularly bright. (And I’m not entirely sure that the apartment numbers are clear on the labels over there, because I’ve never checked. They’re on the box by my door, though. Meh)
Buuuuut…
The labels also included my name. I happen to know that there is no buzzer labeled Payne at that entrance, because I had to randomly buzz up and bug several of my neighbours over there in order to be let in to get my stuff. You had to do the same thing, huh? Pretty goddamn rude, if you ask me. You obviously didn’t even care to find the correct delivery location.
When you didn’t see a 2W or a Payne you should have double checked everything. Maybe called me. Whatever. Anything other than leaving my stuff in some random place, inside the first door you could find with an address that looked KIND OF similar to the one on the box.
Especially since I have never authorized UPS to leave my packages ANYWHERE unattended. Especially not at the bottom of the stairs of a section of the building that I do not live in and have no access to.
Plus, you did it two days in a row. On the first day, I called to complain, and was told that they would contact you to tell you that I did not receive my packages, and to figure out what the fuck had happened to them.
So yeah, you’re just stupid. Fuckin’ asshat.
One point for you because the labels were slightly wrong due to one lost character.
But then minus a billion points for being a rude, lazy, mindless dipshit.
Sincerely,
Me
This is why we don’t pay you, Comcast
The Comcast guy didn’t show up to fix our cable today. This is the second time someone has been scheduled. The cable line coming into our apartment is old/bad, and needs to be replaced, but I guess it’s never going to happen. So, I’ve pulled as much of the line as I can up through our floor, and taped it to the wall in such a way that the signal seems as strong as possible. Meaning that certain channels on our non cable-box having TV are snowy, but at least no longer snowy AND in black and white. And that my Internet connection still sucks ass, but at least no longer cuts out every 15 seconds (I’ve managed to get it down to every 5 minutes or so).
I figure we’ll probably move out of here before I manage to get a tech guy out… even if we don’t wind up moving out in the next month or two like Sean wants to. Because I think I misheard the time span I was given on the phone. I don’t think they said between 10 and 12 AM. I think they might really have said between 2010 and 2012.
Anyway, I’m posting this mostly to point out that I’m not (necessarily) ignoring anyone’s e-mails or IMs etc… It’s just such a pain in the ass to have to press send 87 times to get anything to work. Packet loss packet loss packet loss packet loss packet loss packet loss packet loss packet loss packet loss packet loss.
Election endorsements
I’ve seen a reasonably high percentage of the blogs that are nominated for this year’s Weblog Awards, but most of them don’t deserve the Candice Seal of Approval (in accordance with Sturgeon’s Law, 99% of everything is shit). I will only be voting in six categories, since they’re the only categories of weblogs I really browse often. All of them have sites I look at every day in them, so… go vote for these. I read most of the science category, but I’m going to vote on alternating days for just two of them.
Also, as penance for a bitchy comment I left in Raymi’s blog, I am requiring myself to specifically mention that you’d better check out her site, and vote accordingly as well, because she’s a pretty bitchin’ chick. Seriously, you’ve got to respect anyone that is intelligent, confident, funny, pretty and original but that also doesn’t let it go to their head and turn them into a douchey, pretentious, self-important, self-righteous dipshit. It hardly ever happens. Plus, Dooce sucks, and I don’t want her to win. Please kill me if I ever start a mommy blog (not that I intend to become a mommy any time in the next oh… 50 years), and kill me twice if it’s half as insipid.
Yeah so, the image takes you to vote for Raymi, too… I can’t help it if she’s persuasive…
Anywho, you can click any of the category names to go directly to the relevant voting page:
Best Comic Strip: Savage Chickens
Best Canadian Blog: Matthew Good
Best Science Blog: Pharyngula and The Bad Astronomy Blog
Dear Comcast
Does this seem acceptable to you:
[00:25] *** You have been disconnected.
[00:51] *** You have been disconnected.
[01:12] *** You have been disconnected.
[01:19] *** Lost connection to network (Error Code: 10054).
[01:34] *** Lost connection to network (Error Code: 10054).
[01:59] *** Lost connection to network (Error Code: 10054).
[03:08] *** Lost connection to network (Error Code: 10054).
[04:15] *** Lost connection to network (Error Code: 10054).
[04:17] *** Lost connection to network (Error Code: 10054).
[04:28] *** Lost connection to network (Error Code: 10054).
[04:44] *** Lost connection to network (Error Code: 10054).
[05:16] *** Lost connection to network (Error Code: 10054).
[05:31] *** Lost connection to network (Error Code: 10054).
[05:43] *** Lost connection to network (Error Code: 10054).
[05:50] *** Lost connection to network (Error Code: 10054).
[07:15] *** Lost connection to network (Error Code: 10054).
[08:20] *** Lost connection to network (Error Code: 10054).
[08:24] *** Lost connection to network (Error Code: 10054).
[08:34] *** Lost connection to network (Error Code: 10054).
[08:47] *** Lost connection to network (Error Code: 10054).
[09:21] *** Lost connection to network (Error Code: 10054).
[09:31] *** Lost connection to network (Error Code: 10054).
[10:34] *** Lost connection to network (Error Code: 10054).
[10:43] *** Lost connection to network (Error Code: 10054).
[10:49] *** Lost connection to network (Error Code: 10054).
[11:25] *** Lost connection to network (Error Code: 10054).
[11:35] *** Lost connection to network (Error Code: 10054).
[11:54] *** Lost connection to network (Error Code: 10054).
[12:36] *** Lost connection to network (Error Code: 10054).
[12:39] *** Lost connection to network (Error Code: 10054).
[12:50] *** Lost connection to network (Error Code: 10054).
[13:18] *** Lost connection to network (Error Code: 10054).
[13:27] *** Lost connection to network (Error Code: 10054).
[13:48] *** Lost connection to network (Error Code: 10054).
[15:35] *** You have been disconnected.
Candice makes a controversial point
I checked Google, and people have already said this, but… I’m going to say it again, because it’s true. And it doesn’t seem like anybody has put it as simply as I’m about to:
The Internet is not a medium.
The Internet is not a medium in the same way that newsstands, DVD racks, hard drives, briefcases or Tupperware storage bins are not media.
The end. Bye bye.
Edit: I thought I might as well link to the Google search results for “the Internet is not a medium“. Bleh. As if it makes me any more authoritative than not authoritative at all. Um, I went to university for New Media for a year until I realized I was too smart for that shit, since I’m a genius and all? Does that count?
Edit2: Library shelves are just about as media-y as the Interweb. Also, I’m a bad Canadian. Fuck Marshall McLuhan. Say anything about him in a comment and perish.
Edit3: Those Google results include a lot of sites that claim that “the Internet is not a medium for [suchandsuch]” (emphasis and suchandsuch mine). Fuck those people. Whatever the Internet is, I can do whatever the fuck I want with it, so there. Take that. Fuckfaces. It’s not for copyright enforcement. It’s not for business transactions. For literacy. For community, junk mail, advertising, entertainment, blah blah blah. It’s for whatever I want. I am the Internet.
The Internet is for me.
End end end.
links for 2006-12-01
Dear everyone with an RSS feed
Here’s some advice. I know that we all hate image leeching. But if you’re going to set your htaccess file to disallow hotlinking, could you please take a few minutes to add popular web-based news aggregators like Bloglines as exceptions? I’m tired of having to toggle sending referrers on and off every five minutes in order to be able to see pictures of Britney Spears’ pussy on The Superficial. Thanks.
(I have to turn sending referrers back on when I’m done because pain in the ass WordPress doesn’t work properly without it. I remember to do so only after typing up an entire post, and clicking publish. Then when I press the back button to try again, the post is gone, and I have to type it out all over again. This just happened for the umpteenth time. If the post is any longer than this, I usually don’t bother. Seriously, fuck you WordPress.)
(Google spell check recognizes the word umpteenth??? Really?)