My sister says I’m odd because I just finished adding two 1/4 lb. bags of rubberbands to my rubberband ball (which now has a five inch diameter, I guess I’ll take a pic later). And yet she is the one walking around the house with a cutout cartoon of Dave Thomas on a stick saying “Dave Thomas, Founder of Wendy’s says not to be so rude.” I’m concerned about that girl’s sanity.

…

I am now unemployed, thank God/Eris/Bob. I’ve never read much about Tim Horton, but I think he’s the Devil/Greyface/a pinkboy.
Now… two days left to pack up everything I own. Um.

…it’s happening again.

wait.

and then do it some more.

Some answers:

Honey dijon chicken sandwich, with same large-coke-no-ice, two double-chocolate cookies.
The seat NEXT to the seat where he usually sits. NOT the other corner like I’d expect.

*yawn*

My new favourite band: Skellator. Er. Or not!

Anyway, here’s a story. A couple of days ago, a guy came into Timmy’s. And he had a dime stuck in his chest hair. Just sitting all snug in there like a baby bird in a nest. And that is the most interesting thing that’s happened to me in a while.

And that, my friends, is sad.

There is a guy who comes in every day and orders the chili in a breadbowl deal. He substitutes the medium coffee for a large coke (with no ice) and the donut for two cookies. Costs him about $6.52, I believe.

And what I want to know is this.
He always sits in the same spot. The quietest corner of the smoking room (it’s nice in there, it’s air-conditioned) and reads. Sometimes for several hours.
If somebody was already sitting there, what would he do?
And what if we ran out of chili?
And what is he reading that makes him want to stick around Tim Hortons so long?
Cause I sure as hell wouldn’t.
Or is it just the fact that I’m working that makes it seem like forever.

The small double-double ($1.05) and three plain old-fashioned Timbits for his dog (free) guy is moving to Vancouver. He won’t be back in the store anymore after next week. And neither will I. And that… is… excellent!

“Ever since the extremely truthful experiments Freud performed on his patients during the studies of psychoanalysis we have learned much on the topic of the human mind. In recent years the study of colours and their effects on the human brain have been quite extensive, branching from mood and emotional simulants, to even mind control.

“That’s right, as the studies showed, subjects made to read textual information in the format of an opinion were 85% more likely to agree and believe in that opinion than with any other colour. For more info see this link”.

Of course, I have instinctively known these facts all along. You thought I only wanted to hurt your brain, when in actuality I’ve been in control of its every thought. Not even bringing this to your direct attention can dilute the effect…

Now if only I could come up with some useful or at least entertaining applications of this theory…

The annoying thing about finding in your logs that people have been referred to your site through an e-mail is that you can’t tell what that e-mail said, nor who sent it, nor to whom. So identify yourselves. At once! This involves up to six people (it’s happened three times), and I want your names, chop chop!

(Note to self:
Stop obsessing over logs.
Stop obsessing over logs.
Stop obsessing over logs.
Stop obsessing over logs.
Stop obsessing over logs.
Stop obsessing over logs.
Stop obsessing over logs.
Stop obsessing over logs.
Stop obsessing over logs.
Stop obsessing over logs.
Stop obsessing over logs.
Stop obsessing over logs.
Stop obsessing over logs.
Stop obsessing over logs.
Stop obsessing over logs.
Stop obsessing over logs.)

I am going to chew the Cappuccino Trident. If I never post again, you will know why.

Whoever keeps letting the mosquitoes into this house

is going

to

die.

I will swat them to death.

Ah, the miracle of Coca-Cola. Whatever. I think my mother has gone mad. She’s soaking our plates in it. She’s pouring it down the drains. She’s running it through the dishwasher… It’s MAGIC. Or something.

I must say, though.. These are all better ideas than drinking that horrible stuff. Tastes awful. Burns your throat. Soda is such a silly thing. Carbonation… what kind of idea is that. It hurts me.

Also related… and frightening: Refreshing Your Business (a Coke site that was taken down when the general public started visiting. Too bad it’s been copied elsewhere, huh? lol), Coke Cult (just sick).

Heyyyy… the layers on this page are all overlappy on the browser on this computer… that won’t do at all!

I’d fix it, but… I’d rather just say: nobody on planet Earth is allowed to use IE 4 any longer. Nor Netscape, because I can’t be bothered to dowload it to check out what hideous things it does to mutilate this page.