Category Archives: General

ONE BOOBS PLEASE!???@

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The Internet is like, overflowing with smartitude lately.
“do u remmber me soo niuce ur boobs what size ur boobs?”

Uh… yeah. I remember every single guy on the internet who has ever asked to see my boobs. Because there’s only like… 5,897,547,235 of you. ZOMG! A girl on the Internets!

In this day and age, it is pretty durn convenient to have me a unisex middle name. You know, in case I ever want to talk about something other than the fact that somebody seems to have left a reasonably attractive pair of breasts in my shirt.

Okay, okay… I encourage it. Only because I like to feel vastly superior to everyone on the planet as a hobby. It still boggles my mind that people can be so retardified by titties. I should post some chatlogs I’ve got in my IM history from the last few days… of people talking to my completely UNCONFIGURED chatbot. It asks them questions like “So, have you seen *favmovie*?” because I haven’t set any of the variables. And they still don’t catch on.

We’re all doomed.

Job Offer

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Hello opportunities are currently opened
The position is still Open and is based on a ”First come, First serve Basis” and because we are looking for Official Representative/Book-Keeper in the United States.
I am in reciept of your email and it is note worthy to know that you are willing to work as a Representative/Book-keeper in the States who would help to establish a medium of getting our funds from our customers there because the payments are issued in form of U.S. POSTAL MONEY ORDER OR U.S CERTIFIED CASHIER’S CHECK that is issued by United States Bank and which are not readily cashable outside the United States.
The inability to get our payments in cash has posed a big problem and has affected accounts reconciliation and turn over grossly and I hope that having you as our official Representative/Book-keeper in theStates would help to ease our transactions and services with our Customer.
I want you to know that these are ”Legitimate Transactions” between our Customers in the United States and our company Representative and there is no ”Legal Risk” as these are payments for goods already bought and delievered. We are offering 10% of whatever amount it is that you cash ”Per Transaction” OR weekly as salary and subject to your satisfaction you will be given the oppurtunity to negotiate the mode by which we will pay for your services as our Official Representative/Book-keeper in the United States.
I Assure you that all your vital personal informations released to us will be held in very high confidence/privacy and WILL NOT be released to any THIRD party as we respect your privacy. Only your Name and Address will be given to our U.S Customers/Clients for the issuance of our payments to you.
A confirmation will be sent to you upon reciept of the above informations from you in your next email so that your informations can be integrated into Our Database and you can get started on the Job.
IMPORTANT: YOU WILL BE REQUIRED TO STAY IN-TOUCH BY CHECKING YOUR EMAILS DAILY FOR UPDATES AND ALSO PROMPT/IMMEDIATE REPLIES TO MY EMAILS WOULD BE REQUIRED OF YOU.

Yeah… sounds pretty “Legitimate” huh? Where do I sign up? I have about 4,792 of these in my inbox. Thanks, Craigslist!

You know. I should really get around to styling the blockquote tag one of these days. Bah. I should really get around to redesigning this whole site so people won’t complain about my beeeeyooootiful colours anymore (damn you all, I like them). Also, my blogroll is terribly out of date. Pumpernickel!

Anyway…

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That post from yesterday that got all scrambled was supposed to say something like:
“Red tape at the post office today…”

But definitely not black tape. You can’t send packages through the mail with black tape on them. Says the PATRIOT Act. This country = dumb.