I’m not really too sure what’s specifically supposed to be memorialized this weekend, but from what I can gather it has something to do with grilling, football, beer, and car sales. Kind of like May Two Four in Canada, but with slightly less beer (Canadians must drink an entire “two four” over the weekend), slightly worse (and wussier) beer, and it seems like camping is not entirely obligatory. I don’t know if there are fireworks, but I can only assume that there are because these kooky Americans seem to find any excuse to blow things up. Is that kind of thing really appropriate on a “memorial” day? I don’t know. I wouldn’t figure that it would be. It’d be like fireworks on Remembrance Day. Seems perverse. Maybe it’s a celebration of the dead. Like an Irish wake. Or maybe everyone is full of shit, doesn’t know what it’s all about, and doesn’t care. Either way, I don’t have any beer or the potential to get any, so screw it!