Thing-a-Day: Day One — Not the Roast Beef, but the Gravy

References to a study or somesuch from Australia have been going around. “Female” skills are becoming endangered, apparently. (I’m not even going to get into the whole female bit.) They say that only 51% of women under 30 can cook a roast. I hope that’s wrong, because here’s how you do it: obtain meat, put meat in oven, put meat on plate, eat meat. You don’t need anything that qualifies as a recipe, as far as I’m concerned. Just instructions. Unless you consider “season to taste” a recipe. So the roast isn’t really my thing. I rarely if ever make anything like it, because it’s just my husband and me, and we never manage to finish leftovers. But I know that I can cook a roast, and I did so partly to say “so there!” to the article and partly because if you’re going to mention roasts to me so many times in a day or two, RSS feed, I am going to need to eat one.

My thing is the gravy, which I have never bothered making before. I had the idea that it was really easy to screw up for some reason, so I never tried. Either that’s totally wrong or I got lucky. And I doubt that it was luck… I looked up a recipe during the day, but just threw in what seemed like reasonable amounts of ingredients when it was time to put together (I’ve got no printer and no memory for numbers!) It was totally better than whatever that glop that comes out of a can is supposed to be, and maybe slightly less terrible for me (maybe). So hooray!

(And now we will see if I can get this posted properly — I have never used Posterous. In theory this ought to go to my WordPress blog, which may or may not automagically post it to my Twitter account. Let us see!)

I will donate one dollar to charity for every comment on this post, up to one dollar.

This holiday, we wanted to enable the Chrome community to work together for a good cause. Starting today, we invite you to support five worthy causes by counting and “donating” the tabs you open in Chrome.

Everyone’s total tabs will determine a charitable donation made on behalf of the Chrome community, up to one million dollars.

In other words: we want people to switch to Chrome and have a one million dollar advertising budget to make it happen. Otherwise they would just skip the bullshit and donate the million dollars they’re already committed to donating.

It’s still charity, kind of, so I’m not so very mad at you, Google. Those million dollars are multitasking, at least. It’s better than TV ads or billboards. But I challenge just one company to just one time run a campaign like this without including the words “up to ______ dollars”.

Ya know, I suppose there are possibly some nice tax benefits to “donating to charity” as advertising. That might explain why companies do this kind of thing so often. It’s also a very good form of advertising to choose if you’re trying to get people to think nice thoughts about your product or service, most definitely (while not even realizing that they’re being advertised at!)

Of possible relevance

From the Principia Discordia, the least retarded bible I am aware of.

A Sermon on Ethics and Love

One day Malaclypse the Younger, the Benevolent Polyfather, asked the messenger spirit Saint Gulik to approach the Goddess and request Her presence for some desperate advice. Shortly afterwards the radio came on by itself, and an etheral female Voice said YES?

“O! Eris! Blessed Mother of Man! Queen of Chaos! Daughter of Discord! Concubine of Confusion! O! Exquisite Lady, I beseech You to lift a heavy burden from my heart!”

WHAT BOTHERS YOU, MAL? YOU DON’T SOUND WELL.

“I am filled with fear and tormented with terrible visions of pain. Everywhere people are hurting one another, the planet is rampant with injustices, whole societies plunder groups of their own people, mothers imprison sons, childen perish while brothers war. O, woe.”

WHAT IS THE MATTER WITH THAT, IF IT IS WHAT YOU WANT TO DO?

“But nobody wants it! Everybody hates it.”

OH. WELL, THEN STOP.

At which moment She turned herself into an aspirin commercial and left The Polyfather stranded alone with his species.

But why block so many people, Candice, why!?

I post damned irregularly over here, so (nearly) no one reads this blog, and all none of you have asked any questions, but I’m in blabbity mode today.

@questular is my follow-whore Twitter account. I’ve got plenty of followers over there, but approximately 0% of them value me and/or are of value to me. Or did/were, when I was still messing with them, anyway.

I don’t post links on @candice nearly as often as I used to (I moved my linkage to @candibot, though I haven’t put much effort into pointing that out), but when I did, depending on the time of day, I usually got at least 20 clicks (with 500-some followers), as opposed to maybe one click (with thousands of followers). 500 (now 777) is an artificially low follower count, but of the hundreds (and hundreds) of followers I’ve blocked, hardly any of them were ever interested in me in the first place. Good riddance, meaningless integer incrementers!

I’d like to be able to keep track of how many people are really paying attention to me. Since my follower count doesn’t automatically reflect that (although spammers, at least, are eventually removed), I do it by hand. Pointless, really… in the end, there are just about the same number of people who give a damn about my feed, but I do it anyway. OCD?

I know normal people probably just check out how many people reply or retweet or follow their links. I shrug, and I shrug again! Possibly (definitely) I just have too much time on my hands. But I doubt very much that the number of replies/RTs/clicks I get has been affected more than the teensiest little bit (though I’m gladly minus the contributions of jerks, perverts, spammers, idiots, and trolls), and my percentages must be crazily higher than they would have been otherwise. So if I ever start to care about that, bonus for me!?

Also, my followers are awesomer than yours (on average), :p

It would be so lovely if they’d let me protect my account (approve or reject followers) without making it private.

Lost Recap: S06E08 “Recon”

My site was down last week, so you don’t get a recap for “Dr. Linus”.

Pffft, okay, fine. Here: Benjamin Linus is a creepy jerk who is also pathetic and has a shitty life. Did we need a whole episode to fill us in on that? Lost, you’re neither answering nor raising any questions here.

Annnnnnnnnd, this week: Who cares!? Sawyer is naked! <3 <3 <3333333

Lost Recap: S06E06 “Sundown”

Blah blah blah. I don’t like Sayid. Blah blah blah. More Sayid. Yeah, I got it. He’s got demons and shit. Why doesn’t anybody else find this character as annoying as I do?

Everybody’s acting all weird. Still hot, though.

Piss Sayid:

Piss Christ:

I’m never going to get this ominous melody out of my head, am I?

And surprise! It’s a maddening cliffhanger ending!