Candice Payne

I bet our landlord is glad this cold weather is almost over! For reasons he doesn’t bother to be aware of or give a shit about! Guess what happens when our furnace keeps breaking down (won’t ignite) and you don’t do anything to properly fix it besides jiggling some wires until it works one single [...]

I go to start some laundry. Some guy is in there putting his laundry into the dryer at the same time I am putting my laundry into the washer. The washer takes half the time of the dryer, so I wait for the amount of time the dryer takes to go switch my laundry from [...]

Not typos. Not grammatical errors. Not putting i on the wrong side of e. Not anything from the list of commonly misspelled words. Not screwing up some absurd foreign word with too many or not enough vowels. Not mixing up homophones or near-homophones or not-even-really-close-at-all-but-I-can-sort-of-see-a-resemblance-homophones. I’m talking about spelling mistakes where the person must have [...]

Painted the background of these postcards two days ago, but couldn’t figure out what I wanted to do with them,  so I left them blank. Good effort, me! Yesterday a stencil appeared in the mail that was coincidentally just the right size, so ta da! Flying Spaghetti Monster postcards. Messy ones. Needed a smaller sponge [...]

I don’t care about football one bit, but there were so many mentions of chili in my Twitter stream… so I made some. Tastes much better than it looks as a photo taken with my cell phone and its dreadful flash. Did you know some people use a recipe to make this stuff? Here’s how [...]

Someone posted some of these with a link to instructions earlier. They’re pretty, so I tried it. And then I slapped twelve filters on it in Photoshop because my heads hurts and I couldn’t be arsed to do a proper job with my camera (I still haven’t figured out a way to take macro photos [...]

Tonight, in preparation for the 10:23 Challenge, I will be preparing a homeopathic “remedy” (I will actually be using the resulting liquid for purposes of attempted murder and/or suicide). Since I’m planning to keep on potentisating my remedy until I’ve got a dilution of at least 24X/12C, which may very well take me all bloody [...]

My favourite ebook reader for my Android phone is FBReader. It seems to handle ePub files the best, but not every ebook I download is available in that format. I convert those files with Calibre (which I also use to organize my library), but in certain cases the conversion isn’t perfect. The most annoying problem is incorrect character [...]

I can’t tell you what my thing is today. I can’t even give you a hint. I can, however, give you certain non-vital project information, such as the fact that production cannot begin until my entire kitchen has been thoroughly cleaned, and that I’m going to go initiate that process as soon as I’m done [...]

References to a study or somesuch from Australia have been going around. “Female” skills are becoming endangered, apparently. (I’m not even going to get into the whole female bit.) They say that only 51% of women under 30 can cook a roast. I hope that’s wrong, because here’s how you do it: obtain meat, put [...]