Candice Payne

And I don’t work for free. (Although, to illustrate my point I will be breaking this rule a teensy bit and giving away some free and undeserved attention.) Down with this kind of thing: MTV wants me to advertise MTV and ZYNC. They want me to spam my Twitter followers and Facebook friends. They want [...]

This is a post about something that drives me insane. Aren’t they all posts about somethings that drive me insane? I’m posting this mainly to ensure that you, dear reader, go mad with me. Have you ever noticed that people often insert an extra “is” into sentences containing wording similar to “the thing is that”? [...]

Look. I think it’s perfectly legitimate, if you’re resurrected, to adopt a new (re)birthday on the date you became one of the undead. But if you’re going to do so, as far as I’m concerned, you forfeit your original birthday. So what’ll it be, Jesus? Christmas, or Easter? You can’t have both. I know you’re [...]

pigs 1, originally uploaded by mariacaridad. Sean and I are so over filthy, deadbeat roommates. We’re doing the post-filthy, deadbeat roommate cleanup this weekend. Pro-tip: do not live with filthy deadbeats! Even if they are (ostensibly) your friend, and they’re suddenly desperate for a place to stay. You will hate your life. Definitely don’t do [...]

Misspellings: Coller and conceded (instead of conceited) (I’ve been complaining about people whose online profiles claim that they are “not conceded” for at least 5 or 6 years now). All icons from FastIcon.com, but especially that fugly ginormous RSS icon. Not being able to sleep due to mold, weeds and our lack of air conditioning. [...]

Look, geniuses. The words “tips” was not originally an acronym for “To Insure Prompt Service”. For one thing, it would have to have been TEPS, because the proper word is ensure, not insure. For another thing, you’re not going to ensure prompt service by giving someone a tip as you’re leaving. See how that doesn’t [...]

Okay, I’m too lazy to figure this out myself right now, because a quick Google search didn’t instantly turn up the answer (if there is one). Is it possible to get StumbleUpon to stop showing me stumbles that consist of a single Jpeg? Because I really don’t care for them, and it ruins the entire [...]

Our DVR destructed a couple of days ago, so we had a tech come down with a replacement this morning. Everything was working fine while he was here. The menu loaded, the program guide loaded, the channels were working, and the On Demand intro ran just fine. A little bit after the cable guy left, [...]

I hate it when this happens. Oh, yeah. I finally chose one. I guessed wrong. Dammit. Ohmigod, so bored. What can I do tonight for zero dollars?

$370 to replace a lost green card! I thought $290 was excessive, but I hadn’t noticed the additional $80 biometrics fee. What the fuckity fuck? That’s it… The USCIS is now officially at the top of my Asshole Organizations I Have to Deal With shit list, which is as follows: USCIS NSLSC/OSAP UPS Comcast Microsoft [...]